Looking for Peace? Try Surrender

This month I am following along with Oprah’s podcast version of Super Soul Sunday. She and Eckhart Tolle are discussing his book “A New Earth” chapter by chapter. I have had so many wonderful moments of clarity rereading this book. Today I really understood surrender and peace.

Many years ago when I had younger children and did a lot of volunteering at their school and at church I was often tired, busy and dissatisfied. One afternoon while driving home from a painting class I was taking, I clearly heard the word “surrender.” It was not Morgan Freeman but it was commanding enough that I immediately began sobbing as I was driving. I knew that the word meant for me to surrender all the busyness, fear, doubt - surrender it all and paint.

At that time in my life I was pretty conflicted. I was in deep with all my volunteer commitments. My children needed my hands on attention and I was not yet ready to surrender and paint. That message, along with many others through the years, has haunted me. Even as I tried to push those feelings and urges down, always in the back of my head there is some part of me that knows I will never be happy until I surrender.

Since my double-hip replacement in January, I have been forced to slow down and surrender to my recovery. The hip replacement has given me the luxury of slowing down and taking more personal time for things other than errands. This morning was day two of breaking out the oil paints (after nine months of part-time art journaling) and getting back into a routine.

I did not know what I was going to paint or even if I had a spare canvas. I just knew I needed to paint. Luckily, I found an old half painted canvas, a reference photo and I went to town. It didn’t take long but when I was finished I sat back and felt at peace.

This reminded me of what I have been reading in “A New Earth.” In chapter two Eckhart Tolle references resistance as an inner contraction, a state of being closed up. When you are in that state nothing good can come to you. When you open up and surrender a new dimension of consciousness opens up. Instead of closing yourself off and fighting against life you will be in alignment with that creative intelligence that animates the universe. He says “you will rest in the peace and stillness that comes with surrender, you rest in God.”

This also brings to mind Steven Pressfield’s book “The War of Art.” He describes overcoming resistance and surrendering to your inner urge to create like slaying a dragon –everyday. After you slay the dragon there is peace in the kingdom but each day brings a new dragon.

Today after I finished my little rooster painting I had that wonderful feeling of peace. Jesus described it as the peace that passes all understanding. I know it won’t last but each day that I choose to surrender to my art I know that I will be rewarded with peace.

Peace is a powerful reason to do something. More powerful and meaningful than Instagram likes, followers, or a vague dream of making money. Those are the outward, ego demands we put on the ephemeral process of making art.

Tomorrow is another opportunity to practice surrendering again. I will try it, how about you? What brings you peace? Do you have something in your life that calls you to surrender to it? It doesn’t have to be painting or anything related to art. The Creative Intelligence that animates this world operates in endless ways.

Beth

New School Year, Second Chance

I don't know about you but I always feel like the beginning of the school year is my chance to revisit and re-energize all those New Year's resolutions I made last January and have slowly let go of. I did not totally drop the ball but it is hard to focus on your to-do list when you have kids on summer vacation, wonderful family visitors and all the good beer and weather of a German summer.

Summer play time also brings good ideas. I visited a lot of beautiful places this summer, some famous and some not. All those images in my brain have to go somewhere - hopefully they will show up on a canvas this winter. 

My obsession with painting chickens is slowing down as I prepare for the next series I have in mind. It is going to be a lot more complicated than what I currently paint so I am summoning the courage to actually do it and not keep putting it off (it combines portraits and birds).

This year I also need to focus on actually selling artwork!
I imagine a lot of artists have this goal. I plan to research online marketing, ramp up social media and basically market myself which is really scary to an introvert like me. This month I am showing all my chicken paintings in the local library on Vogelweh Base here in Germany - which is a start in the right direction.

Next up - paint, paint, paint!

As I ease back into regular blog posts, here are a few art related posts from the summer.

Please leave a comment and let me know: How was your summer? What are you hoping to get done this fall?

Until next time,
Beth :-)

The beginning of yet another chicken... 

This little watercolor sketch was from the pool. Can you see the man that was in front of me? 

Giant tile mosaic in the Paris metro. 

Comparison Poison & My 10 Favorite Artists on Instagram

So lately I have been totally addicted to Instagram. There are so many artists and so much art, its obvious I was going to get sucked in. Yes, I know I am a little late to the party, IG is already saturated with art. There are millions of prolific artists all over the world posting daily. Most of the time it is really interesting to to see what people are working on.

For artists this is all brand new. It used to be that you had to search out other artists in guilds, classes or clubs. You had to buy expensive art magazines to see what the most elite group of artists were doing. If you were a new artist still honing your talent, forget it, you were stuck alone in your basement or at your kitchen table until you felt good enough about your work to put yourself out there.

Don't get me wrong, IG will never replace the authentic camaraderie and support you get from actual physical interaction with other artists. But it does democratize the system a bit, you no longer have to be represented by a gallery to show the world your art.

Here's the catch - as I scroll and scroll through my feed and see so much art - the good, the bad and the ugly included - it's hard not to get lost in all the noise. There are so many pictures posted every second that I can easily get down on myself. It seems so futile to post one of my own pictures, who is going to see it anyway?

There are so many amazing artists posting that I find myself playing the comparison game. I am really not even sure what I am comparing myself to. Other artists seem to be selling so many paintings, entering so many juried shows and relaxing with coffee in their amazing studios. My brain tells me this is their curated "highlight" reel but I still find myself comparing. 

In some situations you have to compare to know what you are getting but with social media comparison leads to jealousy and unhappiness. Comparison is all about ego and competition. What am I jealous of? Of other people's talent? Of their success? of their good? Maybe all of it. Wow, sounds shallow of me but aren't we all guilty of this on some level, social media or not?

Jealousy will always block our own prosperity, spiritual as well as financial.

How do you get out of that insidious comparison rabbit hole and recognize your own prosperity? By reminding yourself that its not a competition. Fear is the root of comparison. We are avoiding ourselves and focused on the other because we are afraid that even if we give it our all, it won't be enough.

How do we heal that fear? Hit it with love. Love your life. Love yourself, you are enough. Be grateful for your own good. When you are full of gratitude for what you have and do it is hard to be jealous and compare yourself to others.

When you are full of gratitude then you can look at Instagram and other social media for fun, to be inspired, to get new ideas and feel in community with others. "I am grateful and happy with my life!" that is what I have to remind myself when I am tempted to compare.

In the spirit of gratitude and inspiration here are my top ten favorite artists on Instagram. Click on the links to see their feed.

Ashley Longshore: This artist is ireverant and funny. She promotes self empowerment in a way that's fun. I love her art too.

Alex Callaway: This artists' still lifes are unbelieveably beautiful!

Lisaeks: Lisa Ekstrom's abstracts are simply wonderful.

Churchgoinmule: Artist Marshall Blevins' drawings and mixed media art (often including a mule) are lively and fun with a heavy emphasis on NOLA . 

Vanessa Cooper: I wish I could paint like this artist. I love how she incorporates birds, flowers and china in her paintings.

Gingerwoodturner: Franz Keilhofer makes beautiful wooden bowls. Plus I like seeing his big red beard frequently covered in sawdust.

Susan_Obyrne_Ceramics: I have a thing for Susan O'Byrne's ceramic animal heads. She takes faux taxidermy to a new level

Embroidery: Jenny Hart of Sublime Stitching is making embroidery cool again! 

Curvilinear: Amy Abshier's lonely paintings of women are characters that make you want to read their stories.

TrudyHarleyArt: This realist still life painter dangles everything by a string except her talent.

Augustwren: Jennifer Orkin Lewis has done so much with a sketch book and guache. Her drawings and colors are a delight.

Of course these eleven (I couldn't stop at ten) are only a drop in the bucket of the MANY talented artists I follow. Maybe you will want to follow them too. In the infinity of the internet I am grateful there is room for everyone!

A Glossary of Chickens

A Glossary of Chickens
There should be a word for the way
they look with just one eye, neck bent,
for beetle or worm or strewn grain.
"Gleaning," maybe, between "gizzard"
and "grit." And for the way they run
toward someone they trust, their skirts
hiked, their plump bodies wobbling:
"bobbling," let's call it, inserted
after "blowout" and before "brood."
There should be terms, too, for things
they do not do –like urinate or chew– 
but perhaps there already are. 
I'd want a word for the way they drink, 
head thrown back, throat wriggling,
like an old woman swallowing
a pill; a word beginning with S,
coming after 'sex feather" and before "shank."
And one for the sweetness of hens
but not roosters. We think
that by naming we can understand,
as if the tongue were more than a muscle.
- Gary J. Whitehead

I found this poem in a book of the same name. The book was in a box full of free stuff outside of a neighbors house. When I saw the title I knew I had found a treasure. I love chickens as I do all animals and like to believe they have personalities and thoughts just like people do. That may sound crazy, and yes, I do like to dress my pets up on occasion. (But that's pretty common, right?)

I like the last two lines of the poem. Perhaps by naming we are trying to understand, by painting we are trying to understand as well. I am not sure if we really do though. Maybe our brain like our tongue is really a muscle and not as capable as we think.

I recently went on a tear painting chickens. I thought of the series more like chicken portraits. I imagined grand lives and personality traits for each one I painted. Most of them are proud, one of them is gentle, one is really pissed off and one is inquisitive but really scared. Can you guess which is which? Here they are collected below. I hope you like them. There are definitely more to come...

Plymouth Rock Rooster, 9.5" x 7", oil on canvas PURCHASE HERE

Blissed Out Chick, 9.5" x 7", oil on canvas  PURCHASE HERE 

Sacred Heart Rooster, 9.5" x 7", oil on canvas,   PURCHASE HERE

Black Rooster, 9.5" x 7", oil on canvas  PURCHASE HERE

El Jefe, 16" x16", oil on canvas  PURCHASE HERE

El Jefe's Family Portrait Series, Part 1 of 3 "El Jefe", 12" x 8"   PURCHASE HERE

El Jefe's Family Portrait Series, 27" x 12"   PURCHASE HERE

Cheeky, 8" x 8", oil on canvas  PURCHASE HERE

Tan Rooster, 9.5" x 7", oil on canvas  PURCHASE HERE

Plymouth Rock Rooster, 9.5" x 7", oil on canvas  PURCHASE HERE

If you liked these chickens leave a comment or buy a painting!

Talk to you later!

Beth

Is Your Brain feeling a Little Tired?

This week my brain was tired. Do you ever feel that way? 

Believe it or not, painting is hard work. Yes, it's totally enjoyable, but it is hard work all the same. I have discovered that it takes about four straight hours of staring hard at something and trying to copy the colors and shapes before your brain starts to get tired and yell for caffeine or sugar. (Maybe that is just my brain... some brains probably yell for carrots). This week after painting so many days in a row my brain decided it needed a nap and a little switch up.

Instead of painting I decided to make stencils to use while painting. (art geek)

Everywhere you look there are patterns. Your iPhone makes it easy to record them. If you like playing around with mixed media or if you like playing around with scissors you might want to try and make your own. This would be a fun exercise to do with kids, how can you replicate the world you see around you?

I used a plastic folder with pockets (left over school supplies.) I drew the design on the folder with a sharpie then cut it out. Totally easy and now I have my own stencils.

This is only the beginning of pattern collecting. Tomorrow I'm back to painting! 

Finished stencils. 

Photographic inspiration while walking the dog. 

Balcony railings. 

Not sure what decade this is from... 

The painted stencil. 

Dear Beginning Artist

C.S. Lewis — "Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn."

Dear Beginning Artist:
Here's the one thing that has taught me more about painting than anything else: Paint every day. Those three little words are enough to strike fear in the hearts of every art student cradling those fragile dreams of success. It's advice given by every art teacher - but to take it you must surrender to your craft.

I, like many of my fellow students, loved making art but only did it in those few hours a week of class. There are amazing artists that have been taking classes for years because paying for an art class is the only way they would let themselves make art. For fifteen long years I took classes, made art off and on and stuffed a lot of those dreams of an art career down below everything else. I could blame a lot of things but really it was, as Steven Pressfield puts it in his book "The War of Art", Resistance that was the culprit. 

It is said, the thing you resist persists. Thank God that is true! In the 25 plus years I have been personally putting up some form of resitance the desire has persisted. Our move to Germany literally gave me the freedom to make some sort of art everyday. And I discovered, just like all those fine art teachers told me, painting everyday has been my greatest teacher. 

Larry Bird practiced free throws, 300+ a day.

Chef Greg Mindell said it took him baking over 1,000 croissants before he started to understand it.

Researcher K. Anderson Ericsson came up with the theory that elite performers have practiced 10,000 hours. That equals roughly practicing everyday for 7 years.

How do you master your chosen craft? To give something seven years you must love it. Once you give yourself permission to do what makes your heart sing, do it over and over again! So simple its hard to get!

Practice makes perfect

Reflection on a Month of Painting

Well January has come to a close and I think I did pretty well on my attempt at consistent daily painting. I did not paint every day of January (I knew I would not paint when friends were in town) but I came pretty close. 

I painted 23 out of 31 days. I finished 16 paintings. I started two canvases that are still in progress. I sold two paintings from the month without even pushing it. (Thank You Collectors!) I listened to hours and hours of podcasts! All in all, I think it was a pretty successful challenge. 

What was the most important thing I learned from this foray into daily painting? That for better or worse the more I paint, the more I want to paint! Painting (of any kind) is the place I find my bliss. Its the place my soul finds restoration and my spirit's vibration is raised. I go into my studio at 9:00 and before I can blink its almost 4:00pm, my kids are coming home and my painting day is over.
The interesting thing is, in the past I have always thought "finding the time" would be the hard thing about making a commitment to my creativity. Once I made the mental commitment that I would be spending some portion of most of my days painting, everything just some how fell into line. Sort of the same way you know that every day you will eat dinner and plan accordingly for that. 

January is done and there are still 11 months left in 2017. I will not say I am going to paint everyday because some days are for museums, exploring the world and filling your creative well in other ways. But, now that I have pledged to my art my most valuable asset (my time) and see that it is not daunting but in fact liberating, I have no plans to slow down!

Question: 
Is there an activity you do that makes time stand still and leaves you in a state of bliss?
If not, can you commit to exploring what it could be?
If there is, can you do it more often?

Let me know! I want to hear what it is for you.

My last six painting days were spent on this still life. "Tomatoes" 12" x 30", oil on canvas. 

Pomegranates and Sunsets

Lately, I have seen so many beautiful sunsets. I have risked my life trying to get my iPhone out to take a picture of them while driving in the car. (Do not tell my husband, he does not want to know that!) My kids make fun of how I babble about all the oranges, salmons, pinks, purples and blues. My youngest even took a stealth video of me going on and on about the sky one evening. Have you ever seen the double rainbow video on YouTube? It was almost like that.

One of my favorite artist, 18th century Spanish painter Louise Melendez, combined his still-lifes with dramatic backgrounds. He would often throw in a sunset or pretentious landscape behind his melons and the effect was stunning. I thought I would try the same with my little still life painting today.

Pomegranates are not only beautiful but symbolic. They symbolize fertility and abundance because of their multitude of hidden seeds. Jews eat their 613 seeds on Rosh Hashanah, Muslims place them in the Garden of Paradise, Persephone was tricked into eating pomegranate seeds and had to stay in the underworld with Hades, Turkish people crack them on NewYears's and according to Wikipedia the pomegranate is the symbol of Armenia.  (Really, why are people not painting more pomegranates?)

Aw Chesnuts!

Today's daily Painting is Chesnuts. Europeans seem to love them. They have been in the grocery stores since the fall and you can always find them roasted downtown.

My memory of chestnuts is from my childhood in SC. My aunts had a huge chestnut tree. I don't remember ever eating the Chesnuts but the husks were always laying around the yard sharp and spiky, ready to stab your feet through your shoes. Summertime was especially treacherous.

Chestnuts are beautiful, if you really look at them. Wonderful tones of brown and umber, it does make you want to roast them up or put them in your stuffing. I found these two on the sidewalk but after painting them, I think I am intrigued enough to buy a bag at the store.

Detail of brushwork. 

Day Three Chilies

This is day four of the 30 paintings in 30 days challenge.

Painting-A-Day

Back to oil painting after about six weeks. I felt a little rusty but anything feels that way when you're not used to it. For example; I am also trying to start the year off right by cooking and eating healthier- that feels weird too! 

Best of luck to everyone else out there who is trying to start the year off right. ;-)

Day Two and Still On The Wagon...

Day two of the painting challenge is in the books! The family and I are lounging around the house and enjoying our last holiday before school and work puts us back into our routines. 

We woke up to snow on the ground and things seem to keep getting sleepier from there. (The dog is actually sleeping at my feet as I type this.)

I did manage to sneak into the studio and finish up a project from the online course, Lifebook 2016, that I took this past year. This gal looks a little bit like a gypsy but the message is right. Choose love!

Tomorrow it is back to oil painting after a month of mixed media. I can't wait! 

Habits, Resolutions & Mark Twain

"You can't throw a habit out the window, you have to walk it gently down the stairs."
- Mark Twain

Well here it is January 1st. I think I have been secretly waiting for the New Year to get back on track. Yes, the holidays got me a little off base. Resistance was tugging fiercely at my sleeves sometimes even tying my arms down. But now it is past Christmas and New Year's Eve so there are no more excuses.

The New Year is a time to take stock of all the bad habits you have acquired over the year or all the good habits you meant to make but really didn't. Most of the time habits are made totally unconsciously over a long time period so it makes sense that breaking a habit is hard and seems to take forever.  Creating good habits has to be done consciously and that makes it seem hard and creep slowly, painfully along - even if its just perception.

Yes, January 1st is here. Its the time to put your money where your mouth is and accomplish all those things you have been meaning to do all year. For me that means blogging more, setting up an email list and Etsy site, eating better, drinking more water and finally starting A Course In Miracles- whew! Those are a lot of good habits to create.

To help me make a serious commitment and start the year off right (because I love goals and resolutions) I signed up for a challenge. During the month of January I will participate in artist Leslie Saeta's 30 in 30 Challenge. Over the next 30 days I will attempt to paint every single day. Sometimes it will be a complete small painting sometimes it might just mean working on a larger piece. The point is to get in the studio every single day and do something creative. That is a big deal for me! I am the queen of three steps forward and two steps back.

January's goal: Each day I will paint something and do a blog post about it.

Three steps forward and two steps back still makes you one step ahead, right? 30 steps is really going in the right direction. Plus, thirty days just might be long enough to make it a habit I won't abandon by February like the gym or my gluten free diet!

I think Mark Twain might agree, thirty days is long enough to walk a habit safely up the stairs and leave it there.

Explaining Inspiration

This week I spent a little time exploring a new creative process that turned out to be a blast. I want to share it with you because whether you make art or not, we all have the choice to look at the world around us and see what peaks our interest and create a life that's beautiful.

This process was taught by Tracy Verdugo on Tamara LaPorte's "LifeBook 2016," an online course I have been taking for the past two years. As an artist I am often asked where do I get my inspiration. Usually, I respond with "I don't know" or the equally vague  "life, I guess." But really, inspiration is everywhere - you just have to be willing to pay attention to the details. 

In this process, Tracy teaches students to make inspiration bundles as a creative prompt. The task was to go through 6 or 7 books or papers you have collected and tear out a random image (don't over think it) so that you have a stack of about 7 to 12 pieces of paper. Taking each piece of paper one at a time see what appeals to you and incorporate that into your piece. Below is my finished painting that, in the end,  I was very happy with. BUT - like everything in life - there was a catch...

"Little Details" 9 x 12" mixed media

This is my first image and it is not hard to see where the figure is represented. What WAS hard and what you do not see is that underneath all the layers there was a beautiful, painstakingly  painted re-creation of this woman in black and white. Then I came to my next image and had to  decide what to lose and what to keep. What to paint over and what to incorporate.

In the end it turned out to be a much more interesting painting because of what was kept and lost. That is how I see life. We can try as hard as we can to be something we think we "should" be, to hang on tight to those images and stories we want to tell about ourselves. However, the real beauty is in the details. What we observe, discard and layer. That is how we take our world and create a life that is authentic and worth living.

Each image below is represented in the finished product. Can you spot the inspirational details?

Yes, even a #10 envelope can be inspiring if you really look at it.

Sing in Me O Muse

Right now I am feeling thankful that I have this time to work in my studio and get connected back to my spirit and my art.

My usual M.O. Would be to rush into some crazy job or volunteer opportunity to create self worth. But instead of panicking, I am going to trust that my highest hope for myself and God's will for me are in alignment. My path (career or otherwise) is unfolding and I need to trust not panic.

Yesterday, I sat with my thoughts and called in the muse. Above is a picture of her surrounded by symbols of where I am and want to go creatively. She is colorful and bold - just what I hoped to call in.

"Sing in me O Muse, and through me tell the story." -a rough translation of Homer's invocation to the Muse. 

What are you thankful for today? Are you going to trust your spirit or panic?

It's never too late to make good on a resolution...

...It's never too late to make a resolution for the new year
- even if it is February 2nd!

I could not believe it when I looked at the date on the last blog post. - November 13th? It’s been three months since I declared to say YES to more art time for myself.

It has not all been a bust. Art has been made. Time has been well used and wasted. There have been many Yes’s and No’s. I have just not shared it all publicly.

When I started this website and this art journal I had the goal of sharing my art and sharing some of my struggles and triumphs with whoever might stumble upon this site. I quickly found out that making art was much easier that writing a blog post. 

I tried to tell myself that I was too old and that blogging was for people younger than me. The younger generations have no problem baring their souls. Of course that is not true, age is only an excuse. I also tried to tell myself that I was avoiding it because I was afraid of failure. If I wrote a blog or put myself out there I would be opening myself up to failure and could I handle that? Of course that was not true either, generally, I have the optimism of Scarlett O’Hara.

What is true is this: I have not written a blog post in three months or promoted my art as much as I should have because I have been afraid to be vulnerable. Being vulnerable is hard!  

Being vulnerable means I open myself up to the possibility that you may not like me, my art or what I have to say.

Being vulnerable means I take off the layer of protection I wear. When you draw attention to yourself you loose the safety of the herd. That is why it takes courage.

 Being vulnerable looks like me putting myself out there, creating art, talking about my struggles, fears and triumphs and saying “Hey, I did this.” 

This year I resolve to be courageous by allowing my armor to drop and to be more vulnerable.  I resolve to blog at least once a week and post my other artistic endeavors on Facebook and Instagram when they happen. I resolve to list all my paintings that are for sale on Etsy or some other marketplace. 

If I am not willing to do that, I need to pack up my paints and go home! 
Geesh, I hope this gets easier...

 

Thanks to Brene Brown for The Gifts of Imperfection and Daring Greatly.

Marie Antoinette may have gotten a bad rap...

This week has been fabulous! Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday I painted all day. I even managed to paint a little after getting the kiddos into bed on Wednesday night too.
I have to admit that just three days of creative endeavors has totally lightened my soul. Sounds dramatic but I mean it! I feel light and I don't have that low-level nagging guilt taking up air space in the back of my brain. 
Do some people really live life like this? Not having something hanging over them or having the feeling that they are wasting time on activities their choosing simply because they "should?"

Please Beth, remember this feeling next time you are racing off to some volunteer activity!
Hmmm, what will tomorrow bring?

A few shots in the studio

Because painting is basically a solitary exercise it is particularly entertaining when you are joined by a friend... even a furry one.

Studio Cat will not be ignored.

Studio Cat enjoys a good still life.